Dave
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Post by Dave on Mar 3, 2010 18:47:37 GMT
I was talking with the owner of Dartmouth hire today as I do every Wednesday and we always talk about Torquay United. But just as our threads sometimes end up talking about something we sure did not start talking about, so did today’s conversation. I’m not really sure how it got to where it ended up but I found myself telling him a story of an event that happened to me in a previous job that still makes me laugh when ever I remember it. It was about nine years ago and I was doing some driving for a health care company and I did enjoy it while it lasted as one day I might be at Lands End and then another day driving through the Ronda Valley. I think of all the companies I have ever driven for, this one covered the largest area of the south of England and Wales and this story relates to a sort of secure care home just outside Bristol. It was not an easy place to find as there was no sign to it and the road down to it off the main road was so easy to just drive past and in the end I had to ask in the local shop where exactly it was. Once I found the drive to the home I drove down it and I guess it was about three quarters of a mile to the gates of the home and I pressed the intercom button and told them who I was and then the gates opened by magic. This story is about the same very old lady and what happened on two separate occasions I delivered to the home and it’s the second event that still makes me laugh my head off. But first I’ll tell you what happened the very first time I came across her, well I had finished taking everything into the home and got my paperwork signed and was back out side and sitting in my van. A quick check on a map to see where I was heading next and then I started the engine. I selected first gear and more by habit than need I checked in my right -hand mirror and as I did I just managed to spot the end of someone’s shoe sticking up just in front of my right hand front wheel. I turned off the engine and jumped out to check and I was sure I had not moved the van and so could not have run anyone over. There she was laying in front of both my front wheels and when I spoke to her she started shouting at me” get back in the van and drive over me I want to die” I told her I could not do that and she was going mental and shouting even louder that she wanted to die and I had to drive over her. I rung the homes front door bell and what a job we had trying to move her and she was kicking out and trying to bite us and this lady was 85 years old but I’ll tell you what she sure had plenty of fight still left I her. In the end we did get her moved and back safely inside the home and I drove off shaking a bit as I had come so close to running over her. A few months later I found myself on that same run again and this time was able to just drive to the home as I had remembered where it was from the last time. I was inside the home and noticed the care worker had some nasty marks and scratches on her. So I asked her how she got them and then she pointed to the very same lady I had nearly run over and said she had done it to her. The old lady moved closer to me and I asked her in a light hearted sort of voice why she had done that to someone who was working so hard to look after her and care for her. “Do you know who my dad was” she asked me, I told her I had no idea and she then told me he was a famous professional boxer in the 1930’s “He taught me everything I know and he taught me how to box as well” she replied back to me. Then there I was on the floor with a cut on my cheek as she had planted a right hook straight into my face, I’ll tell you what she sure could hit very hard for such an old lady.  She had to be grabbed hold of by the staff and she wanted to take another swing at me as I was getting up off the floor. When I got back into my van and drove off my face was hurting but I laughed all day as I had been put on my back with a right hook from an 85 year old woman. So what bizarre or strange events have happened to you during your working day? |
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Post by jmgull on Mar 3, 2010 20:56:27 GMT
There has been a few for me over the years Dave! The time when i managed to tip over a ton of Victoria Plums in the middle of Sidwell street in Exeter on a busy Friday morning - thats about 10,000 plums give or take.............and yes it caused a horrendous "jam"  Another time when i was unloading a truck of Bananas with the ex TUFC legend Harry Smith who was the head banana ripener then, it was my job to check weigh them, i came across a really very heavy box.............which instead of containing Bananas was packed with little parcels of pure cocaine  - being just an innocent lad i didn't have a clue what it was at the time, i called harry over, who was just an innocent ex pro footballer.........he had no idea either and took his knife out and split one of the parcels open - "eh lad, i thinks its sherbet" he said in his black country drawl, licked his finger, stuck it in the "sherbet" and licked it all off................it took about 5 minutes of feeling dizzy and sick before he finally collapsed in a heap.............totally hammered, he was driven home and we didn't see him for days! My favorite though was a day when i delivered to the Watermans Arms in Tuckenhay, must be more than 20 years ago now. The manageress was a particularly hard to please lady (evil old bag  ) and would wait for me to bring in the whole order (60/70 cases) then start pulling the gear to bits..........the carrots were too big, the parsnips were too small etc etc. "Show me the bananas young man" she said this one particular day, so i obliged and lifted the box onto the table in the middle of the kitchen and lifted the lid off for her. She pulled out a big hand of Bananas to examine them, still muttering on that last weeks had been too green........when all of a sudden she let out a horrendous scream...."Aaaargggghhh" perched under the neck of this hand, dozing and keeping warm was a huge Bird eating Tarantula! She threw the bananas high in the air.......they went one way and the spider went the other and the lady promptly fainted on the spot............being the true fruit man, i made sure i caught the bananas obviously - Luckily her fall was broken by landing on top of several boxes of lettuce. The head chef, who was in stitches, managed to corner the poor spider and took it out with a couple of meaty blows with a saucepan. Needless to say her days of checking the order in were numbered........we haven't supplied them since though  |
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merse
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Post by merse on Mar 4, 2010 4:14:17 GMT
 When I was a young bus driver with Devon General at Newton Abbot,one of my favourite routes was the "Up The Coast" number 2 route that began at NA and went via Kingsteignton, Bishopsteignton, Teignmouth, Dawlish, Starcross and Kenton to Exeter. We used to use double decker "Regent Half cabs" which meant that the driver sat alone in his cab whilst the passengers got on and off through the front entrance just behind him, an entrance that was protected by folding doors. The day of this incident I was working with an old boy as my conducter called "Bugle" Bill..................so called because of his lecherous nature and insistence that his "old Bugle" needed blowing by any female he could clap his nefarious eyes on. He was a sadly comedic old guy who looked somewhat like Joseph Stalin with his lugubrious face, droopy walrus moustache and wore the old style conductor's cap complete with shiny patent leather peek. He came from the East End of London and never ceased telling us tales of the hard times of his youth and how his elder brother had found him a job but neglected to tell him it was on a one way seaman's ticket to Botany Bay and how it had taken him three years to work his way back to the UK again! Always in the bookies and always broke, that was Bugle Bill. But what I'll always remember of him was the sight of him in the passenger seat of a car that had taken repeated risks to overtake me on the series of bends by Cofton Farm between Dawlish Warren and Starcross tooting it's horn and flashing it's lights in impatient manner as far as I was concerned but totally unaware until it did get past me that old Bugle, waving his ticket machine out of the nearside window; was aboard it rather than the bus. Of course the bell that I had recieved some way back in Dawlish had come from one of the scores of rowdy kids who piled on in typical St Trinians' manner and taken advantage of the fact that he had got off onto the pavement to usher them on in some form of orderly manner. It was they rather than he who then kept up the pretence of stopping and re-starting the bus until that car overtook me, and not my conductor! 
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davethegull
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Post by davethegull on Mar 5, 2010 14:16:20 GMT
Ok, this one still makes me cringe.
Some of you will know already that my business in the UK involves aerial photography. It's mostly archive photos taken in the 1960's of farms, churches, pubs, schools and villages. They are fascinating to look at and see the huge changes in village and rural life particularly the impact that the motorways had on peoples working lives and how villages have evolved in the last 50 years.
In the run up to the millennium we were asked to do some modern photos so parishes could map the changes and see how village borders and infill had affected them. About 3 weeks after the photos had been taken i was in a village near Colyton (can't remember the name) and was knocking on the doors selling them to whoever wanted one. There was one photo that caught my interest. It was a wide shot of the north end of the village. In the background was a farm and you could make out on a neighbouring field a series of 3 crop circles. "Bloody Hell"!!!! What are the chances of that hapening?? Fantastic luck, the farmer's going to bite my hand off for these!!!
So, i whizzed straight round at top speed excited at the prospect. The farm itself was quite a relic, mucky, rundown old on it's knees type place. Nevertheless i hopped out of the car avoiding as best i could the cow crap. I went up to the decrepid door, banged my arrival and waited. After what felt like ages the door creaked open and there was a good old devon farmer, 412 if he was a day with a smell to match. Oh well, i'd come this far so i prattled on about my amazing photo, what luck and how he must be delighted. I looked up at him to not a flicker of acknowledgement of my brilliance at such a find. So i launched in again. He just stared blankly at me. Then said "come with me boy" in his thick farm devonian.
So i followed him across the crap filled paddock around the back of one of the barns.. He stopped, looked at me pityingly and stretched out his arm pointing at the field. I followed his gaze over and there i saw with a sinking stomach a goat tethered to a post. "i move the post every week boy" followed by hernia inducing gravelly laughter!
He did buy the photo, made me a cup of tea and took the piss out of me for 20 minutes about the look on my face when it dawned on me what had really happened.
Doh!! ;D
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Post by aussie on Mar 5, 2010 18:21:33 GMT
So far some real belters there, I`ve only been employed for a week now so not much chance of anything yet but I will let you know if anything wierd does happen!
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Post by longeatongull on Mar 5, 2010 18:55:46 GMT
So far some real belters there, I`ve only been employed for a week now so not much chance of anything yet but I will let you know if anything wierd does happen! Well done Aussie----its great in this day and age to hear of someone getting a job ---what ya doing? Just on this subject spoke to somebody at our local "well known" freezer shop --(not Iceland). They have just taken on a part timer who was succesful from 120 applicants!!!!-----its tough out there |
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Dave
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Post by Dave on Mar 5, 2010 19:03:08 GMT
Well done Aussie----its great in this day and age to hear of someone getting a job ---what ya doing? I will let Aussie tell you what his new job is but I will say he phoned me last week with the news and I was so pleased for him. Its the reason he has not been posting during the day and I decided not to say the reason why just in case things did not work out for him in his first week. I can tell you we were together on Tuesday night and had a long chat and Aussie was feeling very worn out doing his new job, well he has not worked for a while and he had all that forking to do as well I know getting this job has meant so much to him even more so as his daughters birthday is coming up and now he can buy her the present he wanted to buy her. Well done Aussie |
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Post by aussie on Mar 5, 2010 21:01:31 GMT
So far some real belters there, I`ve only been employed for a week now so not much chance of anything yet but I will let you know if anything wierd does happen! Well done Aussie----its great in this day and age to hear of someone getting a job ---what ya doing? Just on this subject spoke to somebody at our local "well known" freezer shop --(not Iceland). They have just taken on a part timer who was succesful from 120 applicants!!!!-----its tough out there Converting car/vans into dissabled vehicles. A little bit of engineering hurt no one, it`s good fun as well if you like slicing up brand new motors and fitting all sorts of mods to them! It`s a bit like scrap heap challenge but you don`t have to find your parts and everythings clean and new! |
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Post by stuartB on Mar 5, 2010 21:46:09 GMT
Well done Aussie----its great in this day and age to hear of someone getting a job ---what ya doing? Just on this subject spoke to somebody at our local "well known" freezer shop --(not Iceland). They have just taken on a part timer who was succesful from 120 applicants!!!!-----its tough out there Converting car/vans into dissabled vehicles. A little bit of engineering hurt no one, it`s good fun as well if you like slicing up brand new motors and fitting all sorts of mods to them! It`s a bit like scrap heap challenge but you don`t have to find your parts and everythings clean and new! fantastic news, well done mate ;D |
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joebarlow
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Post by joebarlow on Mar 5, 2010 22:14:21 GMT
Well done Aussie again. We had a little chat last Tuesday and he mentioned it so good luck with that Aussie.
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Post by aussie on Mar 6, 2010 9:57:46 GMT
Cheers guys you make me feel like I`ve over achieved with all this praise and congatulations! I am pretty chuffed about it, I`ve never had a job that I`ve really looked forward to going to the next day, not like this one, it`s great fun like being a kid in a toy factory where you can make your own toys. Wall to wall tools and hoists and vehicles to build, it`s very wierd driving to work with a big grin and actually looking forward to getting in!
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 7, 2015 13:40:49 GMT
When I was a young bus driver with Devon General at Newton Abbot,one of my favourite routes was the "Up The Coast" number 2 route that began at NA and went via Kingsteignton, Bishopsteignton, Teignmouth, Dawlish, Starcross and Kenton to Exeter. Merse will be pleased to learn that, after masquerading for a while as the number 85, the Newton Abbot to Exeter coastal bus service has now returned to being numbered as the "2". I know this because, as a result of rail engineering works, I've just used the service to travel as far as Teignmouth. Several other Exeter routes have been renumbered back to their days of past glory recently. There are now 6s again between Exeter and Okehampton. If only Stagecoach Devon were to name their buses after famous local residents just like they do in Brighton and Hove. The sight of "Alan Merson" plying its trade "up the coast" would be a sight to see. |
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 9, 2015 3:38:22 GMT
I suppose it is indicative of the reliance so many people had on buses 50-odd years ago that I could probably name most of the bus numbers from the first Western National bus stop on the right in Paignton bus station through to the last Devon General stop on the left. How many hours we spent waiting for buses in those days I have no idea. I won't list them all but I do wonder if there are still 48's, 104's and 105's, 17's and 12's but to name a few still whizzing around the Bay. I remember in the summer we could also get the 128 which stopped quite near our house in Foxhole. It only ran for about 4 or 5 months every summer but it was limited stops so we got off at the first stop after it left the bus station, which was gleaming service to us! I can also remember how our 5d fare into town became 2p upon decimalisation. I have no idea how much that fare is now but undoubtedly it will be charged in pounds!
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hector
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Post by hector on Mar 9, 2015 7:07:45 GMT
I always used to catch the 32 or 33 from Hawkins Avenue, into town.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 9, 2015 11:27:27 GMT
I suppose it is indicative of the reliance so many people had on buses 50-odd years ago that I could probably name most of the bus numbers from the first Western National bus stop on the right in Paignton bus station through to the last Devon General stop on the left. How many hours we spent waiting for buses in those days I have no idea. I won't list them all but I do wonder if there are still 48's, 104's and 105's, 17's and 12's but to name a few still whizzing around the Bay. I remember in the summer we could also get the 128 which stopped quite near our house in Foxhole. It only ran for about 4 or 5 months every summer but it was limited stops so we got off at the first stop after it left the bus station, which was gleaming service to us! I can also remember how our 5d fare into town became 2p upon decimalisation. I have no idea how much that fare is now but undoubtedly it will be charged in pounds! There's a more about buses, including maps, on the infamous "Grammar (s)nobs" thread (October 2013 entries): torquayfansforum.co.uk/thread/3094/torquay-grammar-snobs-threadI've little idea of single-journey bus fares in Torbay. But two journeys of any length will quickly come to a fiver. By that time you're best buying an all-day ticket for £4.90 which will take you as far as Brixham, Dartmouth, Totnes, Newton Abbot and Teignmouth. £7.50 will get you to Exeter or Plymouth and back. Further afield too if you've the stamina and are a good planner. The 12s still operate between Brixham and Newton Abbot. Years ago I was told this was one of the most viable bus routes in the country. That may still be true; it's an operator's dream in the way it links four towns along a busy main road. Florida may be baffled by some of the Paignton routes. The Foxhole service is known as "FOX" (no number). The route through to Totnes and Plymouth is "GOLD". This, together with the X46 Exeter, is operated by fancy double-deckers with padded seats and wi-fi. Then there are several services running to and from South Devon College on the ring road. One of these - the 22 - runs through to St Marychurch and may bring back memories of trips to Plainmoor on the old 30s (later 130s). Anyway enough of these modem buses. Here's a section of a map of Paignton which should interest Florida. It's from the late 1960s; around the time Dickie Bird was playing for Paignton CC (as per another thread).  I may have published this before but here's one from a few years earlier. It's taken from the British Bus Services Map series produced by Ian Allen. To the best of my knowledge this never progressed beyond a set of five sheets stretching from Cornwall to Kent. Here you can see how Paignton marked the demarcation line between the green of Western National and Devon General. Note too the Burton service (orange) running between Brixham and Kingswear.  North of the Kerswell Arch was out-and-out Devon General territory stretching north beyond Exeter and in to East Devon. There were joint operations with Exeter Corporation Transport (another example of green being the colour of the city) as well as small concerns operating in and out of Newton Abbot: Arscott of Chagford; Beard of Widecombe-in-the-Moor; Tor Bus of Haytor.  |
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- being just an innocent lad i didn't have a clue what it was at the time, i called harry over, who was just an innocent ex pro footballer.........he had no idea either and took his knife out and split one of the parcels open - "eh lad, i thinks its sherbet" he said in his black country drawl, licked his finger, stuck it in the "sherbet" and licked it all off................it took about 5 minutes of feeling dizzy and sick before he finally collapsed in a heap.............totally hammered, he was driven home and we didn't see him for days!
) and would wait for me to bring in the whole order (60/70 cases) then start pulling the gear to bits..........the carrots were too big, the parsnips were too small etc etc. "Show me the bananas young man" she said this one particular day, so i obliged and lifted the box onto the table in the middle of the kitchen and lifted the lid off for her.
