Dave
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Posts: 13,081
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Post by Dave on Dec 10, 2008 16:25:38 GMT
I find myself in possession of information which I feel I must make public due to the serious implications for the Club we all love.
This information is first hand, not second or even third hand, so you can rest assured it is 100% accurate and true, it saddens me to have to be the one who feels I need to go public with this news.
Today at 1.30pm our manager Paul Buckle was standing at the greasy spoon snack wagon on the Broad Meadow Industrial Estate near Teignmouth. He looked a lonely and forlorn figure standing in his tracksuit.
His order was then handed to him, a very large bun filled with god knows what, that required both of Buckle hands to get it near his mouth. Fat and parts of the contents were seen falling to the floor as he tried in vain to bite this monster.
I call on Paul Buckle to resign..................................from eating such fast and unhealthy foods, that are putting his life at risk.
I also challenge Alex Rowe to publicly explain why he is allowing the manager to continue on this seemingly destructive course. If what I'm told about the reasons he is currently allowing Buckle to eat such unhealthy food is true, then he needs to consider his position at the club, I believe as well as chairman he needs to take on the role as health food adviser.
Somebody from the club should have the decency to contact the offending snack wagon and strongly advise them that they should not serve Paul Buckle again.
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Post by David Graham's Eighth Pint on Dec 10, 2008 16:37:16 GMT
Well played Dave, you actually had me going for the first couple of pars there!
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Post by weathergull on Dec 10, 2008 16:39:10 GMT
Where did you get this incredible infomation from dave? Surely it could not have been ....................no, I can hardly name him.....................not Southampton gu....................aaaarrrrggghh!
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Post by capitalgull on Dec 10, 2008 17:02:10 GMT
Funniest thing I have read...ever!!! Although I can't vote for it as post of the week, since you have won it far too often for my liking....why can't Merse write us a Jellies Diary as a bit of competition.
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merse
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Post by merse on Dec 10, 2008 17:38:57 GMT
But "he did it for his son" you understand. I was told by many of the regular travellers last night that despite making his ridiculous call for the chairman's head, he didn't put his money where his mouth was at the TUST opportunity after the match on Saturday. The majority of regular supporters don't give a toss what's gone on, don't care who loves who and who doesn't and certainly couldn't find the great man "just up the road from Southampton" at Eastbourne last night...................perhaps he's boycotting grounds that sell burgers (for his son of course )! Interestingly the "other site" is already spawning the poison that it was Buckle's fault last night whilst there's none of that crap on here.
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Post by Budleigh on Dec 10, 2008 18:35:09 GMT
I'm sorry to relay that remarks stated as 100% fact elsewhere implying that the said burger van has been banned completely from Plainmoor are actually false. I have it on good authority that the owner of the offending van, commonly known as the 'Chip Man' or 'CM', has just been politely asked to park his van slightly further away from the ground on matchdays for the time being to avoid any confrontation. This is because there is, at present, a dispute over whether a certain member of the staff, known to be a real Chip Lover or 'CL', ordered a double bacon cheeseburger with chips some weeks ago but then refused to pay for it as it wasn't cooked to an acceptable standard. At this point, allegedly, 'CM' threw a hissy fit and decided to withdraw the usual free bag of fish & chips that he supplied to youth team members on a friday night. It is, though, true that CM had to pay for his own ticket, but then he shouldn't have parked on double yellows..
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Dave
TFF member
Posts: 13,081
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Post by Dave on Dec 10, 2008 18:41:19 GMT
BudleighGull sheer brilliance, fancy doing a double act, I'm still on my agents books
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Dave
TFF member
Posts: 13,081
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Post by Dave on Dec 10, 2008 19:19:15 GMT
I was reliably informed that there was one further episode to this whole story.
Chip Man or better known as C.m was unsure what his next move would be. After some long thought, he had to give in and contact his old known and bitter rival from days past.
At one time both were competing for the same patch, big public fights took place with C.m throwing all he had at S.G while having to duck those sausages. but Sausage Geezer S.G, had some power with the new Mayor, the mayor was only a kid and let S.G walk all over him.
S.G had more recently been seen as a spokesman and controller of a well known broadcast center, but sadly his popularity had faded away and when he was contacted by C.m, he saw a way to get back to the top.
C.m would give S.G all the juicy bits and he could then tell the whole world that because of what he knew, he could then save the world for everyone. The plan failed the sensible people still left on earth could see what really was going on and poor S.G slid even further down the popularity ladder.
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merse
TFF member
Posts: 2,684
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Post by merse on Dec 10, 2008 20:24:27 GMT
I am reliably informed that Sausage Geezer spent Monday night in a Southampton Hotel with other members of that secret society known as "GGG" (Gits, Gumps & Gurners ) You can always spot them in the street..............there's the Idiot Janner Numpty - moral guardian of the loan market, Hump Shore Red - a rather greasy spoonbender and old Sausage Geezer himself - real name Frank F aurter ! Top of the agenda was "Revelations"....................a discussion on the FACT that Buckle doesn't talk to Lee Tisdale talks to the fairies and Sturrock believes he talks to Princess Diana!
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Dave
TFF member
Posts: 13,081
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Post by Dave on Dec 10, 2008 20:32:21 GMT
To anyone reading this thread, please note it is just a fun thread and does not relate to any known living persons any similarities to any persons is purely coincidental.
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NickGull
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Top of the League, we're 'avin a laugh!
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Post by NickGull on Dec 10, 2008 21:09:17 GMT
Oh that's okay Dave. Blatantly I didn't think it was serious at first...
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Post by Budleigh on Dec 11, 2008 7:39:43 GMT
I would just like to add to my revelation above regarding the burger van man that as an oversight Chip Man was in fact on an extented holiday and the business was being run by his brother the Savloy Man (otherwise known as SM)... Not sure how that got past my normal astute proof reading!! So please replace CM with SM in the above story....
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Post by The knight who says "nee" on Dec 11, 2008 13:08:38 GMT
Colin Lee should come out and make a public statement as to why this has been allowed to happen. Either that or he should resign - just what does he do all day anyway???
The only other alternative that i can see is that Mr Rowe should immediatley put the club on the market and announce his (and the boards) intention to sell as soon as possible.
This sort of thing would never have happened under Chris Roberts.
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Jon
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Post by Jon on Dec 11, 2008 13:19:43 GMT
Colin Lee should come out and make a public statement as to why this has been allowed to happen. Either that or he should resign - just what does he do all day anyway??? The only other alternative that i can see is that Mr Rowe should immediatley put the club on the market and announce his (and the boards) intention to sell as soon as possible. This sort of thing would never have happened under Chris Roberts. I want a shrubbery.
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Post by The knight who says "nee" on Dec 11, 2008 13:38:17 GMT
One that looks nice and not too expensive?
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